illusionsssss's Blog

This is one of my favorite weekends in Dallas.  I love to go and walk around with a cold beer on a hot day, see the vendors, taste the food, and mostly listen to the free bands.  If you don't have plans for this weekend, check out the West End in Dallas!

The Taste of Dallas is the largest free outdoor festival in Dallas. This three-day celebration of summer fun includes: taste bud-pleasing food prepared by area restaurants and chefs; live entertainment by national, regional and local performers; interactive sports, games and children’s activities; and a wide array of jewelry, arts and crafts

Edwin McCain, Little Texas and Soul Asylum to perform for free this weekend at the Taste of Dallas.

Edwin McCain on Friday, Little Texas on Saturday and Soul Ayslum on Sunday, and as usual the shows are all free. Check the "entertainment" link to see all the show times. Send an email to dave.demer@tasteofdallas.org to get added to the update list, you'll be the first to hear about everything that is planned!

The Event

 

Some of the best restaurants in Dallas will be on hand to show off. Bring your appetite! Samples range from $2-$5. In addition to the great food and entertainment there are other things to do as well ... check them out:

More than just food!

"Taste Town," a Kids Area to keep the little ones active.

"The Plate Fair of Texas" carnival midway area.

2 stages of entertainment featuring local and regional acts, plus Edwin McCain, Little Texas and Soul Asylum.

Cold drinks to keep the Big Kids happy

Coffee is on me.  Alters not invited. Pull up a chair and make yourselves at home. 

I'll have to do the blog party visual blog another time...as I had already started on the first installment of my camping blog......

Disclaimer:  This is probably an R rated blog.  It is not offensive to me, but probably will be to you. Please do not proceed if you are easily offended. You have been warned.

Camping is fun! It was another first for me..........although I have "camped" (like in an RV camper), I have never "camped", like in a tent.  You know, "roughing it".

 Thursday after work,  I got home and made the dressing for my famous macaroni salad and baked 2 pans of cinnamon roll thingys. My BF gets home and it's time to "load up" for the 4th of July trip to Lake Bridgeport. We load an ENORMOUS amount of crap in the truck. The tent. The propane burner. The coffee pot, coffee, 4 pillows, sheets, a blanket, the suitcase, makeup (mine only), a bicycle (BF said to "ride" to the toilets, 1/2 mile away), fruit salad, macaroni salad, 6 cases of beer in 4 coolers and 100 pounds of ice.  Oh, and the blow up mattress and floaties. Towels.  Garbage bags. Wet wipes. Toilet paper. You get the idea....................I DO want to be comfy while camping!

We leave Dallas at like 5:30, and traffic is a biatch. We arrived around 7:30 pm at the campsite, where about 25 people have now congregated. We "set up camp".  Well, HE set up camp-I have no idea how to put up a tent.  I unload the pillows and air mattresses out of the truck, grab a chair and a beer, and proceed to have a seat and watch BF set up the tent, blow up our mattress, and get the heavy stuff (coolers) out of the truck.  By 9:00 pm we are ready to party.  (Of course, I have had a couple of beers by now, since "he" had to set up camp pretty much by himself.)

And we do party!  Everyone else has been there all afternoon and we have to catch up, ya know.  I think we did pretty good at it.  We "turned in" to our tent, with our blow up mattress, at some point.  Soon I get BF's "sign" that he's horny.  The sign involves brushing up against me, moving back and forth, while gyrating his hips.  We are both quite tipsy, and if there was a camera on us, I bet it was hilarious. Tent door is wide open, and his white ass was all that could be seen.  We are giggling to boot. (Have you have tried to have sex on an under-inflated mattress in a 4 man tent with enough room for 2 people, but ONLY room for two if you are sleeping on top of eachother?). I recommend a 12 man tent if you "REALLY" want to "get physical".

We are in the midst of some outdoor recreational activities (sex), and hear someone outside the tent......and BF yells out (giggling), "WE'RE DONE NOW" (more giggles). (Ummm...I wasn't done, either).  Person outside says "Okay then!".  Of course, I have to pee now. Giggling.

I don't have enough room in the tent to cover up to get OUT of the tent to pee, so my ass and boobies are hanging out the tent, as I am looking for something to cover up.  BF says  "You know you're buck nekkid (giggle giggle)" .  Yes I know this, but hell, I have never been camping, and didn't practice trying to get out of a tent while drunk and buck nekkid. All I know, is I have to pee.  I finally get out.....and go find a tree next to another tent to pee at. (I don't want the smell of pee next to my tent, plus aunt flow decides to show up at this time and I don't need any bears at my campsite!) (giggling as I do it, cuz everything is funny by now).  I walk (crookedly) back to my tent (HOPING it's MY tent, and that I'm not crawling in someone else's tent, though I don't care at this point). 

 I repeat this process several times throughout the night. (the peeing thing)

 To be continued.........cuz this was just the FIRST night!!

Good afternoon all!  Sorry I am late for my own damn party on my rut row blog.  I see I missed some good banter.

You'll have to excuse me (or not), but with my crimson glow and me being on vacation, I slept in til noon.  Then I had to watch the news and get 4 cups of coffee and half a pint of aloe vera on me before I am awake enough to peruse the blogs.

To answer a couple of questions (that I remember) from my previous blog....

TM: I believe in God. I am probably not what you would call a "Good Christian", because I am a sinner on many counts.  Even if I am going to Hell, I believe in God. If that's a problem, then so be it.  My sense of humor is way different than most. I DO NOT get offended at much of anything. So if someone wants to post their POV on my blog, with pictures that are offending to "some", I generally don't have a problem with it. 

Ebs: You are absolutely correct. I didn't have a problem with hills picture at all. But I knew that Tracy would, and that she would delete the entire blog, therefore I deleted his pic (but I still LIKE hills).  And it wasn't about numbers (I always say it is), but sometimes I like to come here and just banter back and forth with ya'll.  These "stupid" blogs that go completely off topic are my favorite.  I also posted a very, erm, sexually explicit animated picture of my own, but deleted it after showing it to a couple of people, and deleted it for the same reason hills' pic  was deleted.

For everyone:  Yes I believe in God. I am not a Bible thumper. If you are, I have no problem with you, we just have different POV's. I believe in freedom of speech and don't like censorship.  If someone doesn't like my blogs or finds them offensive, you are not required to read them. 

Most people here know my sense of humor and that I am not offended by much of anything.  Some people are very sensitive and are easily offended.  We are all different, and we all have different perspectives. Whose is right? I don't know, and I don't care.  I either like you for who you are--good and bad--Or, I don't like you (PM).

One example:  I was camping with my BF this weekend, and there were a VARIETY of people at this "party". Bikers, nurses, police officers, stay-at-home moms, salesmen, etc.  My BF and I were sitting in the shade talking, and one of his friends came up to my BF and whispered in his ear. My BF's friend then sat down and with a joint in his hand, looked at me, and asked if I minded if he lit up.  I told him I didn't mind at all. We were outside, at a park, and although I don't do the pot thing, I don't care if someone else does. I still like this person, even though I don't necessarily agree with what he does.

I say, to each his own, for the MOST part.

Did I miss any questions?

The news has it that a recent blog was taken down due to offending certain bloggers.

Imagine that!

I get to the aforementioned party, and it gets closed down. Damn my luck!

-just sayin'

(See Real estate lady's blogs)

'Pregnant Man' Gives Birth to Girl The Transgender Man Born a Woman Was Impregnated by a Sperm Donor By RUSSELL GOLDMAN and KATIE THOMSON
July 3, 2008

Thomas Beatie, the transgender man who made headlines as the so-called "pregnant man," gave birth Sunday to a healthy baby girl, ABC News has learned.

Transgender male Thomas Beatie has delivered a healthy baby girl. Beatie became pregnant through artificial insemination.(Kristian Dowling/Getty Images)
More Photos

The birth - at a hospital in Bend, Oregon - was natural, according to a source, who added that reports that Beatie had a caesarean section are false.

"She's really cute, really pretty,'' the source told ABC News Thursday afternoon.

Born a woman, Beatie, 34, who had his breasts surgically removed and legally changed his gender from female to male, leaped to prominence around the world in April when the wispy bearded man revealed he was pregnant.

Despite years of taking hormones and living outwardly as a man, Beatie maintained that he retained his female sex organs because he intended one day to get pregnant.

"I actually opted not to do anything to my reproductive organs because I wanted to have a child one day. I see pregnancy as a process and it doesn't define who I am," Beatie told Oprah Winfrey in April.

"I feel it's not a male or female desire to have a child. It's a human need. I'm a person and I have the right to have a biological child," he said.

Beatie was caught on tape leaving St. Charles Medical Center by TMZ.com. He was not carrying the infant.

A woman who appears to be a nurse carried a combination car seat/baby carrier with a white blanket over it. Beatie walked a few yards behind her. The new dad walked easily, although he appeared tired, and despite the warm weather he wore a white hooded sweatshirt along with sunglasses and black shorts. Someone opened the car door for him.

Beatie was impregnated with sperm from a donor. His wife, Nancy, inseminated him at home with a device she said was like a syringe without the needle. They bought it from a veterinarian and it is typically used to feed birds.

I know you will all miss my racist remarks and enthralling news, as I will miss yours.

Sal is recording for me, TM is on acoustics, POV playing drums. PA is playing the flutaphone, and muddy is on KP duty.  Ebony is saving my seat (with a thumbtack or 2 ;)) . Char is serving the wine coolers at this event.  Scottbee is on guard duty and carding everyone at the door.  Lost is in the corner talking to Marks and Kestrel,  and PM is puking in the corner from the smell of lulacs (allergies????),  Furbs is at the keg "pretending" to "get rid of the foam".  CBW is brushing her teeth after smoking a cig.  As for me, gnight all.............see ya Sunday!

Remember this, and think of me:

I leave you with this song:

She was staring out the window of their SUV
Complaning, saying "I can't wait to turn 18"
She said "I'll make my own money, and I'll make my own rules"
Mamma put the car in park out there in front of the school
Then she kissed her head and said "I was just like you"

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Before she knows it she's a brand new bride
In a one-bedroom apartment, and her daddy stops by
He tells her "It's a nice place"
She says "It'll do for now"
Starts talking about babies and buying a house
Daddy shakes his head and says "Baby, just slow down"

Cause you're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'
One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'
And she keeps apologizin'
He says "They don't bother me.
I've got 2 babies of my own.
One's 36, one's 23.
Huh, it's hard to believe, but...

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this"

Awwww, come on people! SMILE!!!! I'll be back! (I think)

Best wishes to all for a wonderful 4th of July! (I already know I missed alot of names, but just know I wish you all a great holiday weekend!)  Gnight!

Police find body of missing Vt. 12-year-old

By LISA RATHKE, Associated Press Writer 33 minutes ago

BETHEL, Vt. - The body of a missing 12-year-old Vermont girl was found Wednesday, hours after documents surfaced that accused her uncle of planning to initiate her into a child sex ring, authorities said.

Brooke Bennett's body was found about 4:45 p.m., not far from her uncle's home, said State Police Director Col. James Baker.

The girl's uncle, Michael Jacques, who has been in custody since Sunday on sexual assault charges involving another underage girl, is to be charged in federal court with kidnapping, police Sgt. Tara Thomas said.

Bennett was last seen alive with Jacques at a convenience store last Wednesday.

"The painful discovery of Brooke's body today is tragic and heartbreaking," Baker said.

He called the death "clearly suspicious" but declined to give details before a planned briefing Thursday morning.

On Wednesday night, about 300 people gathered to mourn Bennett's death in what was originally organized as a candlelight vigil for the girl's safe return.

"Brooke Marie, I love you so much," her mother, Cassandra Gagnon, said sobbing. "I just ask that justice be done for the person who took my baby away."

The girl's father, James Bennett, added, "I know Brooke knows that we love her and will always love her."

Earlier Wednesday, in an affidavit unsealed in U.S. District Court in Burlington, the FBI said an unidentified 14-year-old girl told investigators she was present on June 25 when Jacques, 42, tricked Bennett into thinking she was going to a party and took her to his Randolph home to be initiated into a sex ring.

The girl said she was led to believe that the 12-year-old "would have sex with adult males" during the initiation.

The teenager said she and Bennett watched television for a while before Jacques told her to leave and took his niece upstairs. The witness said she left the house with her boyfriend and didn't see Bennett again.

The 14-year-old said she herself had been having sex with Jacques since she was 9, as part of the sex ring.

Bennett's former stepfather, Raymond Gagnon, appeared in federal court Wednesday on an obstruction of justice charge in the case. He was denied bail and was held pending a Monday hearing.

Police say Gagnon, 40, lives in Texas but often visited Vermont. According to the affidavit, he told police he accessed his former stepdaughter's MySpace page from a computer at his San Antonio home after getting login information from Jacques.

Police said they have evidence that postings to the account were altered to make it appear that the 12-year-old had discussed a secret rendezvous shortly before she disappeared.

Gagnon also told police he had downloaded child pornography onto the laptop, according to the affidavit.

Bennett's mother said she was "very surprised" by her ex-husband's alleged involvement.

___

Judge Halts Dallas Jail Documentary Last Edited: Wednesday, 02 Jul 2008, 4:20 PM CDT Created: Wednesday, 02 Jul 2008, 11:01 AM CDT

A judge on Wednesday approved a temporary restraining order that halted filming of a controversial documentary about the Lew Sterrett Jail.

The decision is a victory for Dallas County commissioners who fought to prevent the planned Discovery Channel program and a defeat for Sheriff Lupe Valdez, who had announced earlier in the day that filming would continue.

Valdez, who released a statement early Wednesday outlining her position, has two weeks to appeal the decision.

"After careful consideration and review and providing county commissioners with additional facts, I am proceeding with plans to allow a film crew for the Discovery Channel to produce a one hour documentary inside the jail," the statement read.

Valdez said objections to the program have been largely due to misunderstandings and a lack of information.

"We have operated in good faith and within the bounds of my authority as sheriff in granting approval," The statement read. "It is an opportunity to show the improvements that have been made in the jail as well as the daily challenges our staff and officers face."

Commissioners had maintained that Valdez overstepped her authority and ignored a county policy that requires commissioners' approval for use of a county building.

Additionally, they said, filming could create security risks.

They sought a temporary restraining order through District Attorney Craig Watkins, but he sided with Valdez.

Filming on the documentary would reportedly last for about a month.

• How to shower like a woman
• How to shower like a man

1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
    
2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and rush to the bathroom.
    
3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror and stick out your gut so that you can complain and whine even more about how you're getting fat.
    
4. Get in the shower. Look for facecloth, armcloth, legcloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
    
5. Wash your hair once with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.
    
6. Wash your hair again with Cucumber and Lamfrey shampoo with 83 added vitamins.
    
7. Condition your hair with Cucumber and Lamfrey conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.
    
8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red and raw.
    
9. Wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Jaffa Cake body wash.
    
10. Rinse conditioner off hair (this takes at least fifteen minutes as you must make sure that it has all come off).
     
11. Shave armpits and legs. Consider shaving bikini area but decide to get it waxed instead.
     
12. Scream loudly when your boyfriend/husband flushes the toilet and you lose the water pressure.
     
13. Turn off shower.
     
14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
     
15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small African country. Wrap hair in super absorbent second towel.
     
16. Check entire body for the remotest sign of a zit. Attack with nails/tweezers if found.
     
17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
     
18. If you see your boyfriend/husband along the way, cover up any exposed flesh and then rush to bedroom to spend an hour and a half getting dressed.
     

1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
    
2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your girlfriend/wife along the way, flash her making the "woo, woo" sound.
    
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see if you have pecs (no). Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror, scratch your balls and smell your fingers for one last whiff.
    
4. Get in the shower.
    
5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth. (you don't use one)
    
6. Wash your face.
    
7. Wash your armpits.
    
8. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
    
9. Wash your privates and surrounding area.
    
10. Wash your ass, leaving hair on the soap bar.
     
11. Shampoo your hair. (do not use conditioner)
     
12. Make a shampoo Mohawk.
     
13. Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror.
     
14. Pee (in the shower)
     
15. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on the floor because you left the curtain hanging out of the tub when you checked your shampoo Mohawk.
     
16. Partially dry off.
     
17. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles. Admire wiener size.
     
18. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.
     
19. Leave bathroom fan and light on.
     
20. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass your girlfriend/wife, pull off the towel, grab your wiener, say "Yeah baby!" and thrust your pelvis at her.
     
21. Throw wet towel on the bed. Take 2 minutes to get dressed.
     

 THE OLD MOTOR

The marriage of an 80 year-old man and a 20 year-old woman was the talk of the town!!

After being married a year, the couple went to the hospital for the birth of their first child. The attending nurse came out of the delivery room to congratulate the old gentleman and said, 'This is amazing. How do you do it at your age?' The old man grinned and said, 'You got to keep the old motor running.'

The following year, the couple returned to the hospital for the birth of their second child. The same nurse was attending the delivery and again went out to congratulate the old gentleman. She said, 'Sir, you are something else. How do you manage it?' The old man grinned and said, 'You gotta keep the old motor running.'

A year later, the couple returned to the hospital for the birth of their third child. The same nurse was there for this birth also and after the delivery, she once again approached the old gentleman, smiled, and said, 'Well, you surely are something else! How do you do it?' The old man replied, 'It's like I've told you before, you got to keep the old motor running.'

The nurse, still smiling, patted him on the back and said: Well, I guess it's time to change the oil. This one's black.

In case any of you use exchange propane cylinders for your grill or camper or other appliances, be on the lookout for blue or green residue around the valve.read the notes below 

Below is a notice received from ND Homeland Security regarding propane cylinders being used for ammonia.  It's bad enough that these meth cooks are using the propane cylinders for ammonia, but now they are recycling them back to the unsuspecting public and creating risk to more personnel. 

 Please inspect your propane cylinders, looking for the bluish coloring on the valve.  If you notice this, don't buy the cylinder.  If you have already purchased one and it has a bluish color on the valve, call your the police and fire department to come to remove it.  Do not move it on your own, as the corrosion may cause a violent release.

I have been sitting around perusing the blogs, and have been asked a bunch of questions.  Now I am SURE that MY answers would be different than yours.......but here are a few Q's:

From BANNED sal: "ill, can you ask the blog mods why they like you"?

Now my answer would be, "because I am intelligent, witty, humorous, and don't charge"

Their answer is:  BS? We don't LIKE you. We BANNED you. Get over it.

Next Q by BS:  So a partial plate means you only need a couple teeth?

MY answer: " yes sal, that's what I mean."

THEIR answer: W.T.F. you smokin?

Next statement by BS:  "They never told me how much it would cost to REPLACE my wisdom teeth.  They only told me what it would cost to pull them.

I am so sorry fox 4, but it is funny eh????  (Calling sal now so there are no surprises) :))

Actually sal, I think you'd be my wicked sister....if I had a younger one.

(oooogssssssss)

I purchased a new granite-ware coffee pot for camping this weekend!!

(what the hell did YOU all expect?)

-just askin'